Ozarks Monte, SASS #66019 Posted January 28, 2011 Share Posted January 28, 2011 Late again,' the third-grade teacher said to little Sammy. 'It ain't my fault this time, Miss Crabtree. You can blame this'un on my Daddy. The reason I'm three hours late is my Daddy sleeps naked!' Now, Miss Crabtree had taught grammar school for thirty-some-odd years.. Despite her mounting fears, she asked little Sammy what he meant by that. Full of grins and mischief, and in the flower of his youth, little Sammy and trouble were old friends, but he always told her the truth. 'You see, Miss Crabtree, out at the ranch we got this here low down coyote. The last few nights, he done ate six hens and killed Ma's best milk goat. Last night, when Daddy heard a noise out in the chicken pen, he grabbed his shot gun and said to Ma, 'That coyote's back again, I'm a gonna git him!'' 'Stay back, he whispered to all us kids!' 'He was naked as a jaybird, no boots, no pants, no shirt! To the hen house he crawled, just like an Injun on the snoop. Then, he stuck that double barreled 12 gauge shot gun through the window of the coop.' 'As he stared into the darkness, with coyotes on his mind, our old hound dog, Zeke, had done woke up and comes sneaking' up behind Daddy. Then, as we all looked on, plumb helpless, old Zeke Cold Nosed Pa In The Butt. 'Miss Crabtree, we all been cleanin' chickens since three o'clock this mornin'... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EE Taft Posted January 28, 2011 Share Posted January 28, 2011 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deja Vous Posted January 28, 2011 Share Posted January 28, 2011 Late again,' the third-grade teacher said to little Sammy. 'It ain't my fault this time, Miss Crabtree. You can blame this'un on my Daddy. The reason I'm three hours late is my Daddy sleeps naked!' Now, Miss Crabtree had taught grammar school for thirty-some-odd years.. Despite her mounting fears, she asked little Sammy what he meant by that. Full of grins and mischief, and in the flower of his youth, little Sammy and trouble were old friends, but he always told her the truth. 'You see, Miss Crabtree, out at the ranch we got this here low down coyote. The last few nights, he done ate six hens and killed Ma's best milk goat. Last night, when Daddy heard a noise out in the chicken pen, he grabbed his shot gun and said to Ma, 'That coyote's back again, I'm a gonna git him!'' 'Stay back, he whispered to all us kids!' 'He was naked as a jaybird, no boots, no pants, no shirt! To the hen house he crawled, just like an Injun on the snoop. Then, he stuck that double barreled 12 gauge shot gun through the window of the coop.' 'As he stared into the darkness, with coyotes on his mind, our old hound dog, Zeke, had done woke up and comes sneaking' up behind Daddy. Then, as we all looked on, plumb helpless, old Zeke Cold Nosed Pa In The Butt. 'Miss Crabtree, we all been cleanin' chickens since three o'clock this mornin'... Lol.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Okie Sawbones, SASS #77381 Posted January 28, 2011 Share Posted January 28, 2011 Yee Haw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted January 28, 2011 Share Posted January 28, 2011 I need to learn not to drink coffee when I read some of these things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sixgunstoo Posted March 23, 2011 Share Posted March 23, 2011 Late again,' the third-grade teacher said to little Sammy. 'It ain't my fault this time, Miss Crabtree. You can blame this'un on my Daddy. The reason I'm three hours late is my Daddy sleeps naked!' Now, Miss Crabtree had taught grammar school for thirty-some-odd years.. Despite her mounting fears, she asked little Sammy what he meant by that. Full of grins and mischief, and in the flower of his youth, little Sammy and trouble were old friends, but he always told her the truth. 'You see, Miss Crabtree, out at the ranch we got this here low down coyote. The last few nights, he done ate six hens and killed Ma's best milk goat. Last night, when Daddy heard a noise out in the chicken pen, he grabbed his shot gun and said to Ma, 'That coyote's back again, I'm a gonna git him!'' 'Stay back, he whispered to all us kids!' 'He was naked as a jaybird, no boots, no pants, no shirt! To the hen house he crawled, just like an Injun on the snoop. Then, he stuck that double barreled 12 gauge shot gun through the window of the coop.' 'As he stared into the darkness, with coyotes on his mind, our old hound dog, Zeke, had done woke up and comes sneaking' up behind Daddy. Then, as we all looked on, plumb helpless, old Zeke Cold Nosed Pa In The Butt. 'Miss Crabtree, we all been cleanin' chickens since three o'clock this mornin'... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackwater 53393 Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 My second grade teacher was named Miss Crabtree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whiskey Business Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 My second grade teacher was named Miss Crabtree. Dang, you remember that far back? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velvet Glove, SASS #50276 Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 Headstone has a similar story, but you can't blame for this story; or for Sammy, the teacher, or the coyote. Let's just say one of our wolves put his nose where it shouldn't have been at a really bad (oh heck nooo) moment...! Bad for him at least...! OOPS! BWAAAHHAAAAHHAAA!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birdgun Quail, SASS #63663 Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 Dang, you remember that far back? Why sure Blackwater remembers that far back. Ms. Crabtree was the last three 'R's school teacher he had until Ms. Shotgun Schoolmarm. Ms. Schoolmarm taught him some more... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tennessee Stud, SASS# 43634 Life Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 Pa Sleeps Naked When I first read that... I aks myself... "The whole dam state!?!?" ts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grouchy Greg, SASS#71981 Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 I've been cold-nosed by dogs in the wee hours of the morning myself, so I can relate to that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bitterroot Jake, SASS #9532 Posted March 28, 2011 Share Posted March 28, 2011 You also got to remember Blackwater just got out of the second 5 years ago, finally made it through the third, start the 4th grade this year. (had to do it Blackwater) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackwater 53393 Posted March 28, 2011 Share Posted March 28, 2011 Yeah Jake's favorite five years were 2004 thru 2009!! After that they Made him start first grade!! As to rememberin' that far back, I'm only twenty-eight! (If you notice, I only stand on the one laig all the time!!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Apache Hawk 60642 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 My 1st grade teacher was Miss Laurel Crabtree..... Had a crash on her too !!! Yup, I member dat fer back... Hech, I had 12 full years in Sandbox Ed !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matador Cowboy Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I can understand the end results, I just can't see Pa sleeping neked. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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