Spooky Joe, SASS #24061 Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I received the following urgent message this morning: Dear Friend, How are you? I hope all is well with your family, friends and pets. I hope this urgent mail meets you in a perfect condition. We have no time to waste regarding the information I am about to tell you, it is an urgent and serious matter. My name is DR.FRANK MILLER, senior data analyst here at the CERN institute based here in Geneva. The European Organizationfor Nuclear Research is one of the world's largest and most respected centers for scientific research. Its business is fundamental physics, finding out what the Universe is made of and how it works. You may have seen on the news that in recent days our Large Hadron Collider machine has been colliding high- speed beams of energy in order to explore new physics and understand how the universe began. CERN have been adamant that this is safe, however I KNOW THE TRUTH. The truth is that this experiment that CERN are conducting is extremely dangerous and could cause global disaster. This experiment has a 95\25 of causing a black hole thus swallowing a large area of the planet. The scientists do not want you to knowthis as they know it will cause panic. However I can help you. I am arranging for a number of selected people to be evacuated to a safe location on an island in the South Pacific via aeroplane. You have been selected from random to take part in this evacuation, thus continuing the survival of the human race. Please, if you are interested, email me back immediately with the following information: Full name: Age: Contact number: Country: Email address: Please send all emails to my private box: drfrank_miller3@yahoo.com.co Regards, and God bless. DR.FRANK MILLER It's obvious that Dr. Miller is a very discerning individual when it comes to choosing people to help perpetuate the human race, but his grasp of basic arithmetic (95/25) is abyssmal, as is his understanding of the Hadron collider and the properties of black holes. That aside, tempting as his offer is, I think I'll pass. All the checking I've done hasn't indicated any SASS affilated clubs in the South Pacific. So I'm offering my seat on the aeroplane (sic) to the highest bidder. This offer will expire in 24 hours so act quickly. Acceptable bids include cash, guns, exotic/antique automobiles, precious metals, or real estate. There will be no extension of the deadline and the decision of the judgs (me) is final. This is a once in a lifetime (literally) opportunity. We'll never know when the black hole will swallow everything except that South Pacific island until it happens. And by then it'll be too late. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barterin Bill Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I'm so tempted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G. P. Cobb Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 They don't need my DNA and that was fixed long ago. I'll perish in Kansas thankyou. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gunner Gatlin, SASS 10274L Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 Isn't he one of Obama's czars? GG ~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sneaky Gun Runner SASS 79775 Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 We have a black hole in DC sucking money at an alarming rate. No one seems to be too worried about that these last few years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I TOLD YOU GUYS THE SKY WAS FALLING, BUT WOULD YOU LISTEN? NO! NOW LOOK WHERE WE ARE. Pssst, where are we guys? It dark and black in this hole. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grizzly Dave Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 Black hole party!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wild Will Bartell Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I'll bring the chips and beer! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gunner Gatlin, SASS 10274L Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 Black hole party!!! That just doesn't....sound right GG ~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deja Vous Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I received the following urgent message this morning: Dear Friend, How are you? I hope all is well with your family, friends and pets. I hope this urgent mail meets you in a perfect condition. We have no time to waste regarding the information I am about to tell you, it is an urgent and serious matter. My name is DR.FRANK MILLER, senior data analyst here at the CERN institute based here in Geneva. The European Organizationfor Nuclear Research is one of the world's largest and most respected centers for scientific research. Its business is fundamental physics, finding out what the Universe is made of and how it works. You may have seen on the news that in recent days our Large Hadron Collider machine has been colliding high- speed beams of energy in order to explore new physics and understand how the universe began. CERN have been adamant that this is safe, however I KNOW THE TRUTH. The truth is that this experiment that CERN are conducting is extremely dangerous and could cause global disaster. This experiment has a 95\25 of causing a black hole thus swallowing a large area of the planet. The scientists do not want you to knowthis as they know it will cause panic. However I can help you. I am arranging for a number of selected people to be evacuated to a safe location on an island in the South Pacific via aeroplane. You have been selected from random to take part in this evacuation, thus continuing the survival of the human race. Please, if you are interested, email me back immediately with the following information: Full name: Age: Contact number: Country: Email address: Please send all emails to my private box: drfrank_miller3@yahoo.com.co Regards, and God bless. DR.FRANK MILLER It's obvious that Dr. Miller is a very discerning individual when it comes to choosing people to help perpetuate the human race, but his grasp of basic arithmetic (95/25) is abyssmal, as is his understanding of the Hadron collider and the properties of black holes. That aside, tempting as his offer is, I think I'll pass. All the checking I've done hasn't indicated any SASS affilated clubs in the South Pacific. So I'm offering my seat on the aeroplane (sic) to the highest bidder. This offer will expire in 24 hours so act quickly. Acceptable bids include cash, guns, exotic/antique automobiles, precious metals, or real estate. There will be no extension of the deadline and the decision of the judgs (me) is final. This is a once in a lifetime (literally) opportunity. We'll never know when the black hole will swallow everything except that South Pacific island until it happens. And by then it'll be too late. This is so interesting... but I do have a shoot that day I am pretty sure.. or have to do laundry? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SASS# 23321 Canelo Kid Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 Spooky Joe, Will you take Zimbabwe dollars for your seat? I might be able to scare up a 100 Trillion dollar note. According to the daily Red Star they're the rage right now. Safe trails, Ckid Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trigger Mike Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 this reminds me of the movie Dr Strangelove or How I learned to Stop Worrying and love the bomb. After Russia detonated its doomsday device to cover the earth with radiation for 99 years, Dr strangelove(peter sellers) told the President (also Peter Sellers) to hide food and put people based on their need(scientist or military etc) in mine shafts. To repopulate the earth the ratio would be 12 women to each male, so the women had to be selected based on their appeal. This tells me that sicne I did not get this email I must not meet their criteria and you do. I am SOOO jealous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Jake1001 Posted January 4, 2011 Share Posted January 4, 2011 Man, I just now saw this for the first time and it started yesterday at 9:18. Now it's 12:44, just missed it by that much. Next time an offer like this comes up, how about 36 hrs. to respond? I'd prolly have to go to the Dr. and git my V-cut reversed to repopulate the world. Big (whats just missed livin' in the South Pacific) Jake Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted January 4, 2011 Share Posted January 4, 2011 With my luck, I would get on the island with everyone and it would be the one to tip over and capsize. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zNZczIgVXjg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Apache Hawk 60642 Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 this reminds me of the movie Dr Strangelove or How I learned to Stop Worrying and love the bomb. After Russia detonated its doomsday device to cover the earth with radiation for 99 years, Dr strangelove(peter sellers) told the President (also Peter Sellers) to hide food and put people based on their need(scientist or military etc) in mine shafts. To repopulate the earth the ratio would be 12 women to each male, so the women had to be selected based on their appeal. This tells me that sicne I did not get this email I must not meet their criteria and you do. I am SOOO jealous. whoa......WHOA......WHOA !! 12 women to 1 man ??? WHAR DA HECK TO I SIGN UP ???? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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