Dusty Balz, SASS#46599 Posted December 2, 2010 Share Posted December 2, 2010 Subject: A Cowboy Named Bud > A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture when > suddenly a > brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. > > The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes , RayBan > sunglasses and > YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you > exactly how > many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?" > > Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his > peacefully > grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?" > > > The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, > connects it to > his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone , and surfs to a NASApage on the > Internet, where > he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he > then > feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an > ultra-high-resolution > photo. > > The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and > exports it to > an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany . > > Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image > has been > processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database > through an > ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after > a few > minutes, receives a response. > > Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, > miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You > have > exactly 1,586 cows and calves." > > "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud. > > > He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with > amusement > as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. > > Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what > your > business is, will you give me back my calf?" > > The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why > not?" > > > "You're an aide in the Obama Administration", says Bud. > > "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?" > > "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even > though > nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to > a > question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment > trying > to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing > about > how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This > is a > herd of sheep. . > > Now give me back my dog. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 Posted December 2, 2010 Share Posted December 2, 2010 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pack Saddle Slim, SASS #73122 Posted December 3, 2010 Share Posted December 3, 2010 You're right on the money, Dusty, as usual. The sad part about it is that it would be a lot funnier if it wasn't so @#$% true!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deja Vous Posted December 3, 2010 Share Posted December 3, 2010 Subject: A Cowboy Named Bud > A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture when > suddenly a > brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. > > The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes , RayBan > sunglasses and > YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you > exactly how > many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?" > > Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his > peacefully > grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?" > > > The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, > connects it to > his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone , and surfs to a NASApage on the > Internet, where > he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he > then > feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an > ultra-high-resolution > photo. > > The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and > exports it to > an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany . > > Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image > has been > processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database > through an > ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after > a few > minutes, receives a response. > > Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, > miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You > have > exactly 1,586 cows and calves." > > "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud. > > > He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with > amusement > as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. > > Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what > your > business is, will you give me back my calf?" > > The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why > not?" > > > "You're an aide in the Obama Administration", says Bud. > > "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?" > > "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even > though > nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to > a > question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment > trying > to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing > about > how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This > is a > herd of sheep. . > > Now give me back my dog. lol..l I love it.. thanks so much Dustys... I bet he kept the dog and still thinks its a calf.. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G. P. Cobb Posted December 3, 2010 Share Posted December 3, 2010 Remember to Vote! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Shoer 27979 Posted December 3, 2010 Share Posted December 3, 2010 You're right on the money, Dusty, as usual. The sad part about it is that it would be a lot funnier if it wasn't so @#$% true!! I'm telling slims cusing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Apache Hawk 60642 Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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