Blackwater 53393

If a steak delivered to my table needs some kind of sauce to make it palatable, I will send the steak back. Anything more than salt, (used very sparingly) and black pepper, (a little more liberally) means it wasn’t cooked right! If you’re talking in a marinade or as part of the cooking process, I’ll give it a try. I like my steak on the rare side of medium rare, rested, and with a light char or good grill marks. I don’t want a steak with much fat hanging off of it. Rubs or seasoning used in the preparation of the steak are acceptable and usually welcome. I got really picky about my steaks as I traveled with my racing partners, years ago! We frequently visited elite steak houses all over the country! At one such establishment in Kansas, one of the legendary restaurants, one of the guys with us asked for A1 when the server brought his steak. The chef came storming out of the kitchen and demanded to know what was wrong with the guy’s steak! The upshot of the conversation was that if there was something wrong with the steak, he’d cook another one for the man, but don’t insult him by putting anything more than salt and or pepper on a steak he served. In another of those restaurants there was a sign that read something to the effect that they would not guarantee the flavor, texture, or tenderness of a steak cooked any way but rare! Ya’ talking “Middle Of Nowhere” brand? I’d love to try it!

Sewer Rats

Many of ‘em drink their beer warm too! I don’t drink beer! It’s the urine of an animal lower on the food chain than bacteria! But I for damned sure wouldn’t drink it warm!

VERMIN!!

If tea was meant to be hot, the Good Lord would not have invented ice, sugar, or mint!!

Vipers!!

With fried apples, loaded baked beans, and creamy coleslaw!!

Wishful Thinking

Yeah!! Ain’t Happening!!

Future Senators!!

NOT IN THIS LIFETIME!! and probably not the next one either!!

Such a DEAL!!

You bought it!

GUACAMOLE! The top of my list is guacamole in a dead heat with green peas and beets!! The beets and peas, I’ll simply ignore. Don’t even THINK of putting guacamole on my plate!!

No deposit! NO RETURN!!

DON’T TALK ABOUT IT!! SET THE TABLE ‘N’ WATCH!!

Take the money and RUN!!

Some sliced tomatoes and a few strips of bacon to complete the plate!!

Usually sausage! Sometimes ham and sometimes it’s just lumps!! Spicy with plenty of black pepper and often some butter melted into it!

Counting Cards

And this is what you’re missing!!

I’m pro supper!!

Loaded Dice

Antipasto!!