Blackwater 53393

An’ a MOON PIE!!

Bright as a Cave!

A flapjack or two short of a stack!

Iced and sweetened!

Bread ain’t Done

With caramel syrup!!

Dumber than a Grubbin’ Hoe!

Cherry Fried Pies

Jelly Doughnuts

GROAN!!

Stuffing!

Flakey as Oatmeal

Thanks!!

Bonkers

How’s this?

Squirrel Turd Nuts

1883 for me!

Intelligence is Suspect!

Double

Wet Work

Muscadine

Lilac

I was crew chief for a semi-pro drag racing team years ago. We were competing at Beech Bend Raceway Park in Bowling Green, Ky during a national event. One of my team partners detonated an engine on the starting line, just after taking the green!! The car stood on its hind legs and shot a section of the crankshaft and two rods about 200 feet down the track. Literally, the front wheels were about six feet off the ground and parts and fluids went EVERYWHERE! The car slammed down and rolled to a stop, about fifty feet from the starting line. We ran out to where what was left had coasted and started pushing the car back and off the track. One of the crew ran down to where the rods landed and, with a shop rag, picked them up and brought them back to the driver as we rolled the car back. It was dead quiet except for a small smattering of applause. The driver looked at the pieces and grinned, then chuckled as he learned into the work. A lady in the front row of the stands shouted, “Look at that crazy fool! He just blew up thousands of dollars worth of motor and there he is laughing!” Ol’ Wayne, the driver, grinned even bigger and hollered back, “Lady! Ya’ might as well laugh! It don’t do a damned bit of good to cry!” He may have gotten the biggest standing ovation of the event!! YEAH! IT COULD ALWAYS BE WORSE!!

Espionage

Violet