LawMan Mark, SASS #57095L

Lazy Christmas Eve around here. Our two are taking advantage of it.

Christmas Carols For My Disturbed Friends 1. Schizophrenia - - - Do You Hear What I Hear? 2. Multiple Personality Disorder - - - We Three Kings Disoriented Are. 3. Dementia - - - I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas. 4. Narcissistic - - - Hark The Herald Angels Sing About Me. 5. Manic - - - Deck The Halls And The Walls And House And Lawn And Streets And Stores And Office And Town And Cars And Busses And Trucks And Trees And ....... 6. Paranoid - - - Santa Claus Is Coming To Town To Get Me. 7. Borderline Personality Disorder - - - Thoughts Of Roasting On An Open Fire. 8. Personality Disorder - - - You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why. 9. Attention Deficit Disorder - - - Silent Night, Holy ....oh look at the Froggy - Can I Have A Chocolate - Why Is France so Far Away? 10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - - - Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,,,,,,,,,,,

Control....Alternate...45 ACP

Got to be an Italian import for that, made in Fra gi le!

I'm buying the wife a wooden leg for Christmas. It's not her main present; it's just a stocking stuffer.

I offered those when I managed a gun store...

Chocolate Gravy 3/4 cup granulated white sugar 1/4 cup cocoa powder 3 Tablespoons self rising flour 2 cups milk 2 tablespoons vanilla extract 2 tablespoons butter Mix the first three ingredients either by sifting or whisking in a bowl until no lumps remain. Add milk and stir until smooth and fully incorporated. Transfer to a saucepan and heat over medium heat, stirring frequently, until desired thickened consistency is achieved, usually 7 to 10 minutes. Remove from heat, mix in butter and vanilla. Serve warm over biscuits, waffles, pancakes, toast or what ever your heart desires.

A doctor on TV said that in order to have inner peace in our lives this time of year, we should always finish things that we start. Since we all could use more calm in our lives, I looked around my house to find things I'd started & hadn't finished. I finished a bottle of Crown Royal, a bottle of Bim Beam, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, tha mainder of Valiuminun scriptins, an a boxa choclutz. Yu has no idr how fablus I feel rite now. Sned this to all ur frenz who need inner piss. An telum u luvum.

Had a horse hit by a semi and ended up dead in the median. Summertime. By 10 am, the horse was swelling up. Got two calls there was a horse delivering a foal in the median. No, he ain't having a foal. I'm sure.

When a Dark Lord of Soot plays in the band...